"We had so little chemistry that I didn't even try to kiss her good night"
Long story short it was a big waste of time/disaster and she highly does not recommend it.
A friend of mine, George is a loyal reader of lifeisnotarom.com and decided he'd share his side of things...to say the least, it's a tad different than Mia's experience.
A couple of weeks ago another loyal LINORC reader, and friend of Elle, gave a woman's perspective on speed dating. It started me thinking, and talking to Elle, about some of the speed dating misadventures I've had. Now, none of them were terribly dramatic; they mostly include 3-5 minutes of awkward conversation and small amounts of hope in obtaining a match (and/or smaller amounts of disappointment in getting or not getting the match). My plan to have a female friend go with me and get into a mock, huge fight when I rotated to her table never did materialize.
The night in question began a few days earlier with, of all things, a Tinder match. A seemingly pretty, energetic, and fun girl and I were exchanging messages and I pitched going for drinks. She countered with a different day, on which I said I was busy. It turns out that she was invited to the same speed dating event (the Jewish community in DC is fairly incestuous). I got the brilliant idea of meeting before the speed dating, having a drink, and then walking over to the event together.
As one can imagine, this was a plan doomed from the start.
The brief sketch of the speed dating pre-date was:
1. Me waiting for her at a fun wine bar down the street from the speed spot.
2. Her texting that she was running late and, after I offered to order a drink, saying she does not drink beer or wine so she'll just have water. (BORING)
3. Me calling an audible for a new place.
4. Her TEXTING ME TO TURN AROUND instead of merely walking up to the table where I was sitting (Elle might edit out this part: her Tinder pictures were clearly taken about 20-30 pounds ago).
5. Walking into the speed dating and not looking in each other's direction the rest of the night.
The "organizers" of the speed dating were pretty terrible and it was taking a long time to get things set up. This allowed me to get a bourbon or two and ease into the right frame of mind to have high-pressured conversations with strangers. During the hour-plus while we were waiting to begin, I started talking to a group of people, including one very hot girl who actually seemed to have her shit together. I assumed I would rotate to her during the speed dating so I was uncharacteristically casual about getting her number (more on that later).
I did start talking to a very cute, and age inappropriate, girl and another guy. The event was starting soon and she was not in the group I would be talking to. So, I got her number before she went to sit down. Nothing materialized there, but the guy standing next to us looked like he was just punched in the kidneys. I felt sorry for him due to his look of defeat but also kind of enjoyed it ...due to his look of defeat.
I rotated through the speed dating and it was typical. Short conversations that don't get much past the initial "resume" questions. A few stand outs were:
1. A woman I have known for years, clearly trying to match with me. She's fine but if I was interested I would have made that clear anytime during the dozens of occasions I've met her. I don't blame her; I blame guys who would actually be interested in a woman and not simply make that clear.
2. Circling back to a third woman I talked to during the waiting time. We did not match but in a strange turn of events, she friended me on Facebook. In another turn, she never responded to my Facebook message and did not de-friend me. Good stuff.
3. The highlight of the evening was J. She was fun, flirty, confident, and smart as hell. She was actually slightly less attractive than some of the other girls and some of the women I usually date but I was more than convinced to spend some time with her on another occasion. Therefore, I got her number after the speed dating was over.
I wound up taking her and her friend home (not like that, sicko) since they both lived within one block of my place. (Oh and sadly, I did not wind up getting the very hot girl from the beginning of the nights number on the way out, as I had planned.)
So the recap for the evening was:
one worthless drink-date,
a very long delay in getting started,
one cute girl's number,
one defeated guy,
one missed opportunity,
one Facebook weirdo,
one fun girl's number,
and leaving with two girls.
In summary, speed dating is a lot of fun if you approach it for the inevitable hilarity that it is. I highly recommend giving it a try!
Post Script: J and I went to a Nat's game, got on camera during the game, and we had so little chemistry that I didn't even try to kiss her good night.
Post Post Script: I ran into J's friend at a courthouse. She remembered me, and not only did I completely blank on the friend, I could not remember J. In fact, I could very well be making up that initial.