Well, it served useful today because it led me to the blog I wrote the semester I moved to Egypt.
I guess that's where the passion for writing began to take shape? One of my posts written before I departed was pretty hilarious and I decided since it's still flashback month / throwback Thursday that I would share.
"So onto a completely different topic... today someone who I was talking to said in regards to someone in their life, "if its meant to workout it will". And of course because I over think everything I decided I kind of agreed but mostly disagreed with that. I think that saying is convenient to say but I believe you have to put work and effort into attaining the things and relationships you want. Getting the job you want or maintaining a friendship or relationship takes a lot of work. You cant just sit there and say, "if we are meant to be friends, we will be" when you get into a fight with someone. Or If i am meant to be with him/her it will workout. Yeah I mean in the "end" everyone will hopefully end up with the person they belong with but that's very unrealistic. I am not a cynical or pessimistic person but I think that you could easily end up with the wrong person because you 1. didn't put enough effort into making it work with the right person or 2. you gave up and settled. Of course there are many other reasons for such but those are the first two that come to my mind. I know so many people who are in relationships with people just because they are scared of being alone and they don't want to have to go out and date again. Dating is a process of elimination, if you don't put yourself out there then you'll never know your options. I am not advocating for anyone to be a whore but if you're not happy or satisfied majority of the time with your signif. other than do yourself a favor and go see whats out there instead of complaining to me about how unhappy you are. I guess this rant/discussion stems a lot from the fact that somehow I became a relationship advice guru/matchmaker. I love setting people up because I happen to know a lot of people and I want my friends to be happy (plus its always worth a shot andddd i might get a shout out at a wedding). And there are a decent amount of happy couples who I have introduced, that truly makes me happy. But what I hate to see/hear is how unhappy my friends are with the people they CHOOSE to date. I really think that if you try your hardest to make something work and you really love that person then you're doing the right thing -- but sometimes that isn't mutual and you're in a relationship with yourself. So friends who are upset-- is the other person making as much of an effort as you are? Is it worth how sad/unhappy you are as often as you are? Sometimes I think that people really need to just sit down and evaluate things. As I have gotten older and moved around the US I have had friendships that have come and go. And honestly I am glad some of them didn't last because they're shitty people and I always put way more into it than they did. I am all about mending broken bridges and reconciling - i hate holding grudges or being upset with friends but sometimes its just not worth it. And you cant expect to be friends with everyone forever-people change and sometimes you don't like the person they changed into.
I went through a phase when I first got to college and I changed dramatically into a person I do not know today. Many good things happened but many bad things did as well. I hurt people close to me and I shut certain people out. But I did snap out of it and I realize the dumb shit I did. But you gotta make the mistakes to learn from them. So I am glad I got that out of the way! Now I am on a road to self-betterment/pursuit of happiness. 3 years ago I would have never dreamed Id be studying abroad in Egypt. I really had no interest in Egypt 3 years ago, freshman year of college changed everything for me and now I am obsessed. Don't even get me started on Nasser. I could legitimately talk about Nasser for days/weeks. Arab nationalism and Nasser's reign is just so fascinating to me. (Geek is coming out!)
Anyways, I have ranted/wrote enough about things that nobody probably even cares about. All I want to say is -- I want to hear about your problems friends, I love and care about you all but you have to start looking out for yourselves as well. Really think about what is best for your life/who you want in your life. I know who I want in mine :)"
HAHAHAHAHAHA everyone laugh with me now. That was 7 years & 12 days ago today.
Isn't TBT so much fun? Funny how your life experiences lead you to your correct path. Perhaps my blog needs to live forever or I just need to write the book and get the courage to publish it.
Who knows.
xo xo,
Elle