"I don't foresee him being my future husband but right now it's okay to just have a guy you enjoy and hangout with. It doesn't have to be all marriage material, all the time."
Because if they did, pretty sure I'd lose both pretty damn fast.
&
this is likely my most incriminating post thus far.
Are you intrigued yet?
First let me tie up some loose ends --
1. I finally went on a date with trauma surgeon Tuesday. Nicest guy but so damn boring I couldn't get home fast enough. Poor guy thought we had a GREAT date and is still texting me to see me again...I'm not going to ghost but I certainly will not be going on another date with him. zzzzzzzzz
2. I went out with the guy I met from the bar Saturday on Wednesday - Jake. We had sushi, went to his place, kissed a bunch and I went home. He is SUPER mellow, laid back, go with the flow, etc. His apartment looked worse than my college X -- but despite all of that he is interesting, loves persian girls, is a good kisser, is very tall and lives 5 seconds away. Also a good texter which is noteworthy.
= a great distraction/summertime fling? perrrrrhaps.
Now let's dig in to last night.
I was in the mood to celebrate and have some fun. I launched a new product and was really excited from the initial feedback I'd received.
Problem was - I had no plans and my main crew all had shit going on.
X factor offered to take me to our sushi spot to celebrate, but I didn't want to drive all the way there, plus it never ends well with us because we circle back to...
"we should be together, we should be dating, your parents are nuts, stop living your life for them, bla bla bla bla." SSDD (same shit, dif day)
Then I remembered Ahnd had texted earlier in the day asking when I was free. So I replied back and said tonight, Sunday and next week.
He said "great, drinks tonight, 8pm."
Boom, that was easy.
andddd yay for date #2, he was pretty great on date #1 so its nice to see the momentum moving with this guy. Plus he's Indian and I find him very, very attractive.
So we go to the waterfront and have drinks and WOW is this guy hot. On date #1 he wore glasses and had shaved -- so he looked young ish.
Last night -- whole different story.
Scruff, no glasses, really well dressed, YUUUUM.
He is also really funny and engaging. He tells me how he grew up in the slums and was in the Indian military which is a good job for someone from a tough background. He quit the military to pursue medicine which is highly competitive in India. Before coming to the US he worked in Bangkok in engineering and drove for Uber.
He is so humble, smart, self made, funny, hot. & he gets better and better the more we talk.
So he goes to the bathroom which happens to be really far from where we were sitting and I get a text from Jake. I ask what he's up to and he tells me he's drinking trader joes wine at home watching movies and I should join.
Being the snob that I am - my first thoughts are 1. TJ wine is = the worst headache ever+I'm not 21 anymore 2. I don't watch movies, I can't sit still that long, zzzzzzz.
Because I've had two drinks at this point I suggest he pick me up from Georgetown in 30-40mins and we can go from there. He accepts.
& Ahnd is back.
I tell him my little cousin from Iran is visiting and has my car (I ubered so I could drink) and she will pick me up but I don't want him to meet her because she's a gossip queen. Sketchy story but he buys it.
He says he'd like to meet the cousin but understands why I'm not down for it.
Fast forward -
date is ending...is he going to kiss me? I hope he does - if its good, I'll be excited to see him again....
No kiss. So lame.
and here's Jake.
I hop in and he pulls me in and gives me an amazing kiss. This guy is highly sensual and affectionate -- mmmmm.
I suggest we go to my house this time. 1. it's nicer 2. no roommates 3. I just cleaned so I look like a functioning adult 4. I am kinda drunk, life is easier if we are at mi casa.
He doesn't object. And as I sit there,
I realize I am breaking all kinds of rules.
(Rules keep my life functioning, I am typically pretty strict on them)
1. seeing the same guy twice in one week
2. seeing him twice in two days (damn, who am I?)
3. inviting them to my apartment (never do I ever)
So we get inside and we talk, I open a bottle of wine, we are cuddled on the couch and the more I drink, the less I remember. I hadn't had dinner so a total of four drinks in maybe four hours and I am wasted. Definitely not acting like an adult at this point.
We are kissing, then clothes are coming off, then we're having sex (that I barely remember) and somehow we are then asleep in my bed. Going to sleep I don't recall even for a second.
We wake up today and my cat is driving us nuts. Typical AM routine. I get up to feed him and feel like I might be dying.
HOLY hangover.
Then I start thinking....
rule 4. don't let guys sleep over - broken, rule 5. don't sleep with people you're not exclusively dating - broken.
Ugh.
So I crawl back into bed and plop on Jake's shoulder. I can't remember what we talked about last night...I hope the sex wasn't terrible because I was wasted...could he tell how drunk I was? Must make no mention of this severe hangover to avoid looking like a party animal. What story did I tell him as to who I was with in Georgetown?
Le sigh.
He starts kissing me. (omg I have morning breath, you poor guy - this is gross, send help, send help)
Then my clothes are once again coming off...
& boom, now we are having sex. Thankfully I am no longer drunk so I can actually gauge if it's any good/if I will want to do this again with him.
It was decent.
Jake is my polar opposite. He is super tall and skinny, really relaxed and mellow, has a very small group of friends, no actual sense of style or aesthetic, and all of that translates to how he is in bed. He's not crazy intense like I am - more sensual, slow, deep. When he kisses me it feels like he is so connected to the moment.
I am completely A-type.
I like my sexual rendezvous to be high intensity, super passionate kissing, rawwwwr. Just wild.
I am short and curvy, high energy, love style and aesthetics, huge groups of friends, packed social schedule and my mind never turns off. When I am kissing someone, I'm typically thinking about something vs just getting lost in the moment. (that part is annoying but it's just who I am)
So this was just something a little different than my norm. But then again, I no longer have a "norm" because I am single so wtf am I even saying.
After the rendezvous, he kissed me for awhile then put his clothes on and departed. I pretended like I was going to get ready and go to work...reality - I cancelled my meeting and crawled back into bed because I was/am THAT hungover.
Way to be an adult, right?
Ahhh forgot to mention that the X factor facetimed me about 10000x last night. I kept ignoring it, it was awkward because Jake kept asking who is calling me so late at night, I said it was a California friend - time difference, you know, nbd....
So far today Jake's texted - he went to this weird, hippie, high school where everyone got to decide if they wanted to go to class, no shoes required, no grades, etc so he sent me a news article about it. Makes sense why he's so damn relaxed all the time. I sent him a link to my HS -- all girls, college prep school....not exactly hippie friendly. He's like, "well it's clear why we are such opposites." YUP, couldn't have said it better myself.
Hopefully being such opposites isn't a deal breaker for him.
I think he's great, I enjoy spending time with him, I love kissing him and I wouldn't mind getting to know him more. I don't foresee him being my future husband but right now it's okay to just have a guy you enjoy and hangout with. It doesn't have to be all marriage material, all the time. <--that is a real departure for me - I have been so laser focused on finding the right guy to marry that I am exhausted. It's summer, I just wanna have FUN. With strings, without strings, with my future husband, without - whatever.
(shit, maybe this hippie/mellow mindset shit is rubbing off a little)
Ahnd has also texted.
"We need to see each other again soon."
I said, "agreed."
He's great. and did I mention hot?
mmmmmm.
So here's to playing the damn game with NO shame.
Have a great weekend.
Elle