It would’ve been a celebration but thanks to you, there is no longer an us, thus there is no longer an anniversary. So maybe this should actually be happy one week of singleness to me, myself, and I. Problem is, it hasn’t been happy. There’s been moments of happiness, strength, and a few laughs. But reconciling that my ex is letting his racist parents ruin our relationship - our loving, amazing relationship - that is just too much. I always thought that in due time, things would change. Their icy, black hearts would melt and I’d finally get the chance to meet them. I was wrong. Clearly.
REALITY: Yep. I haven’t met the parents after a year of blissful dating. Yes, he has met mine. His refuse to meet me because they cannot accept an non-Armenian as their sons girlfriend. He can’t accept a life where they don’t accept his ADULT decisions to marry whom his heart desires. He is 29. It is 2015. This isn't Armenia, We live in America - and so do they.
FLASHBACK: My first true love happened when I was 16. Long story short - his mother was racist against Middle Easterners (I am Persian/Swedish). But from day one, he never let her get away with that kind of behavior. When she was nasty to me, said something nasty to him about me, wouldn’t invite me to a family gathering, etc -- he refused to tolerate it. And by refusing to accept hateful behavior - her shell broke and while she never loved me, she learned to accept me. The rest of his family did love me which made it easier to handle the hell that woman put me through at the time. But most importantly - he never wavered between right and wrong and always did the right thing (which was stand up for love incase you didn't know either).
This is a lesson I never really appreciated until this weekend in Miami. This X factor cheated on me and we broke up - it was a mess, as first love always is. So for many years, I’ve held a negative image in my mind of him -- but now I am actually grateful. Grateful he taught me first that love is worth fighting for and never to let hate win.
So as I sit here typing this on a dreary DC day -- I reflect on the lessons I’ve learned on this crazy journey.
Theres only one prince in the fairytale -- I’m just kissing/dating/falling in love with a LOT of frogs. While hoping the prince is next on the roster. But if he's not, I am definitely not settling. Not again. I am making my list of non-negotiables and the top of the list now states "racist parents? if so, lose my number-k thx bye."
So for now, I’m just going to keep busy and hope that his life without me is far worse than mine without him.