Business Insider wrote about a study that showed - narcissistic women are more sought after than the nice, school teachery type. They basically said, "the nice girl finishes last" which is music to my ears because nice girls are boring as fuck, even as friends. They defined narcissistic as overly concerned with their appearance, highly outgoing, a tad bitchy and very confident.
So one of my favorite dating books, Why Men Marry Bitches gives lots of evidence to support this but I have a mixed opinion...Hear me out.
I definitely fall into the bitchy/narcissist category. I have never had an issue snagging a boyfriend or killing the online dating game BUT every guy I have dumped has went on to get engaged to/marry "the nice school teacher girl" who is probably half as attractive as me and not very confident.
Would these guys have married me if I didn't dump them? I'd like to think so..but who really knows. Dickhead#1 (guy who just got married with beer bottle centerpieces in the middle of fucking nowhere) famously said a few years after trying to win me back and failing that, "maybe I need to date someone less attractive to get the personality that I want."
I wish I could share photos so you could witness the looks discrepancy between dickhead & I...he had terrrrrible acne but was super, super confident and realllly good in bed which kinda trumped the pizza face sitch for me. Plus, it wasn't his fault he had acne - bad genes are bad genes. We can blame his bitchy mom for that. (She is a hardcore racist, my comments are warranted)
So he goes onto marry a girl who is apparently "just like his mother" and works with autistic children. I give a lot of credit to people in professions like that, it takes patience and compassion...I only possess one of those items and its not patience so clearly nursing, childcare, teaching were never possible careers for me.
Onto Liam... he is marrying the girl who cleans, cooks, bakes, mows his parents lawn, and is a legitimate nurse. POLAR opposite of me in every possible way.
So maybe being the confident girl makes it easier to snag the guy but ultimately if you break a guys heart, he WILL go for susie housewife immediately afterwards because no chance in hell could he handle another girl like you. Keeping up with you was way too tiring and ultimately he failed because you dumped him so now its time to find a smaller pond with smaller fish to simplify this equation.
Or maybe all guys really just want to marry a girl who will stroke their ego to no end AND clean up after them like its NBD.
Well guys, it is a big deal. You shouldn't need an ego boost from your gal every 10 seconds because you should be confident enough on your own. Secondly, if you want a housekeeper download taskrabbit and hire one because it sure as hell won't be me or any other self-respecting, badass girl. We have shit to do besides cater to you.
Moving on to the next article that caught my attention...
"The top 5 things to know before getting married"
Only one that stuck out was: the "in love phase" where you are infatuated and overcome with emotion only lasts 1 year into dating.
This resonated with me because by the time I hit 2 years in ANY relationship, I am contemplating whether its the right guy or not, if I could be happier with someone else, etc etc. So far, I have jumped ship and found new guys. Each time I jump ship I am temporarily (for about a year) happier with Mr. New. Fast forward to year 2 and I'd say my happiness is about the same as it was year 2 with Mr. Old. So the lesson is to marry someone you have enough in common with, who has career goals and ambition, and that you respect and love.
Basically, life is not a romcom -- as if you needed further proof.
xo
Elle