Imagine you drop it again. A few more pieces break and you glue it back together again. It's not as pretty as it was but it still works.
Imagine you drop it a third time. The broken pieces are so small, its hard to get them glued back together and the bigger pieces aren't fitting with the small anymore. When you're done trying to put it back together, water seeps from the edges because you've broken it one too many times.
This is what happens when you go backwards and try to fix things with an ex.
It's clearly on the forefront of my mind due to Antonio/his ex + my situation with XF.
They only broke their vase once so there is still hope for fixing it to a usable standard...
Me on the other hand....well, we have broken x3 and the more I try, the more the pieces aren't fitting and the feelings aren't coming back like they used to.
After we broke up the first and second time...I felt paralyzed. How will I ever live without him? How will I ever find someone better than him? The third time? I was ready to never see him again. Sure, I had weak moments but my mind was made up that this was finished.
Of course he comes crawling back (they always do) and I caved and spoke to him. After five months, caved and saw him.
Fast forward 8 months and the vase is still leaking water. Despite hiring a professional to put it back together (his therapist) we still can't keep the flowers watered and alive.
As much as I want this to work with him...the more time that passes, the more I realize I think there is someone else out there for me that I'll be more compatible with...whose love language will align with mine.
It's a sad realization to come to but slowly, I think that's the direction I am headed.
This is why it's so important to hold onto what you have, when you have it. If you let the vase break, there is no guarantee you'll get it back together and even if you do, it'll never be as beautiful as it once was.
I don't blame Antonio for trying to put the vase back together again...it's so fucking hard not to.
But now he has me...and I think I am a risk he feels might be worth taking...
Let's see what he does.
PS tonights date recap will be posted tomorrow AM!