Alright so to keep it short and simple...

Bruce 1 - Went on one date - tall, attractive, great job, super nice - no chemistry. No second date granted. 

Bruce 2 - Met the next night, had talked to him for a few weeks due to being busy and pushing him to the backburner - not as cute in person, nice, frat boy vibe. We kissed and it was actually really good but he just doesn't seem like a potential. I wasn't really feeling it but agreed to a second date. (update: I've avoided planning said date for two weeks now...) 

Bruce 3 - Very promising, world traveler, talked about himself nearly the entire time but overall he was nice. He asked for a second date when he got back into town. He's back, he texted, we'll see where it goes. 

Bruce 4 - This one I was actually excited about - lots of texting the right before he left to go out of town for the weekend he went radio silent. I'm not chasing anyone or anything so I haven't tried to revive the convo either. Is what it is? 

Texas Bruces. For some reason my app keeps giving me guys in either Dallas or Austin and every single one matches with me which is awesome because they're cute, successful, and well educated. As fate would have it, a client of mine just talked about picking a city in between us to meet and Dallas was the chosen. I think it might be time for another business trip...

Other news - I am my BFF's date to his trip his company sends them on for being top in sales. He is number 1 in the entire country this year so it's a big deal. It's in a city I haven't ventured to before and I am pretty excited for the change of pace and some quality time with him. 

It's Scorpio Season and mercury in retrograde which means ex's are going to come out of the woodwork. Not that he counts as an ex but Basebally started texting me again. It's become a bit of a nightly ritual now which is nice because my favorite part of Basebally was simply texting with him. 

Otherwise I am trying to keep myself motivated and moving forward in life. I go through lulls where I feel like a slug. I recently took two weeks off from working out which I haven't done in years. It was weird but this therapist I went to said I needed to chill the fuck out and cool it. She also said I have an eating disorder and am way too controlling over my routines and stuff. I've generally just felt this apathetic vibe. I still show up to stuff, I am back to hitting the gym regularly, I am getting my work done I am just overall kind of tuned out. 

Is what it is - I'll snap out of it soon hopefully. 

More to come on my second date with Bruce 3...

xo xo,

​Elle 

I'd do pretty much anything to snap my finger and be back to when I was semi excited about dating/enjoyed meeting ten thousand people. 

I know it's October and I was really making an effort but then...I got depleted of the desire to do it and deleted hinge, again. 

That's right -- I didn't even make it a month. 

It got me thinking about the past and how I was able to robo-date during the XFactor saga...

I kind of think that I subconsciously knew we'd always get back together so the robo dating was just something to do until we wound up together again. I can say this looking back -- but I probably didn't consciously realize this during that time. 

I really did think we would work stuff out. That his parents would drop this whole Armenian mission and we'd get back to being great together vs damaged goods. 

I know I made the final cut when I decided to end it and move across the country at rapid speed. I just needed to feel free and for some reason, I knew I could do it alone.

Now that I am sitting here alone writing this -- I can reflect and say that I am glad he let me go but I do wish that after this hiatus of being apart, we could rekindle. 

I think with so much time passing (two years now) that if we saw each other again, if we both promised to bury the past -- we could have that magic we had back in the beginning. We've both lived so much since then and learned so much and at the core, I really did love XF. 

However, I think he has moved on with some Armenian girl. As fate would have it, that was the very last conversation we had. He wouldn't confirm she was which obviously confirmed it. Then a friend of his confirmed it 100% so his parents got what they wanted. 

It's scorpio season which means a lot of reflection on past things...in my adult life, XF has been the most significant and definitely the ex I had the most in common with. 

So I won't lie...I wonder what it would be like to see him again. I wish I could. 

Who knows what the universe has in store... 

Thanks for reading my random ramblings...

xo xo,

Elle

After that hiatus it is now October which means I need to get back to the dating scene. 

What's happened since we last spoke? 

I've seen Audi a few times...our most recent interaction was on Friday night when I made him dinner and it became clear that for this to work moving forward, I'd need to be 100% okay not having children and he would have to be okay getting allergy shots forever for the cats. 

I do really like the guy as a human, he's got a good heart but I don't like him enough to commit to him. 

I invited him to be my date for a gala and now I think we are in a slow fade out...so I might not have to have that conversation at all anymore where I uninvite him.... 

Who knows. I had dinner with a friend this weekend and I basically equated Audi to my emotional support animal. We still were talking after such a long time because it became a habit vs someone of genuine, deep interest. 

He also got me through the let down of Texas so hey, things really do happen for a reason. 

Newbies...

A guy I studied abroad with just finished his Navy commitment and is at Harvard for business school and really wants to see me. He keeps in touch and sometimes it's sweet and heartfelt, other times it seems like he just wants sex. 

What I dont understand is why dudes in Boston are all up on it. My childhood ex lives there too and was always bugging me until I blocked him after he bailed on a trip with me to hangout with his ex gf and was posting all over social media about it. My feelings were really hurt and thus I realized, while his ex was overseas, I was just his emotional support animal. 

Thanks but no fucking thanks Bro. 

There are two guys from hinge I've been talking to but have failed to meet yet due to schedule being crazy. I was going to this week but then I decided to hop on a flight to New York - legit yesterday at 4pm this was decided and now I am currently en flight. 

I was trying not to travel for the month of October but the opportunity was there, nothing major was happening at home and off I went. Time for a change of pace, some real city vibes and some chilly fall weather. Can't wait to walk the city with coffee in my hand post spin class on my way to fashion meetings. 

Yes, yes, yes. NYC is also magical in the fall...so pretty and you never know who you'll meet when on an adventure ;) It's October so I am ready to mingle! 

I celebrated my birthday....easily the most low key one I've had in years but my vibe lately has been low key so it was truthfully just fine being small. I am glad I am into a new year of life where I can re-set my goals and intentions and stick to it. My family drama that began last year at my birthday has finally sorted itself out and things are looking up. 

This year I am looking to date intentionally and find a great guy. He can live anywhere I just want us to be really aligned. I'm opening my scope from just my city. 

I want to lock-in a few more clients that are fun and redeeming to work with which I have two great prospects on the docket - one fashion, one fitness, one fashion for a total of 3 really great opportunities. 

So stay tuned for the NYC adventures...I am meeting up with an old college boyfriend for coffee..he happened to text me for my birthday and said we need to catch up soon and he lives in NYC. I happened to book the flight a few hours later and told him I'd be in town and if he's free it'd be fun to see him. So I'm going to do my best to make that happen - not because I want to date him but because I am one of two of his only friends from college. He was a drunk idiotic frat boy and pretty much turned everyone close to him, against him and I always forgave him... Anyhoo, Paul is his name and he is wildly handsome... We rendezvoused in NYC after my ex Liam and I broke up in 2012...Then I saw him again in 2013 the week after he'd met his now very long term gf who happens to have the same name as me...

I remember I was in NYC with a client when I was dating Liam and Paul came to grab a drink with me before I hopped the train back to DC...We were having so much fun and then we looked down and I saw the time and that I was going to miss my train. So we hop up, he grabs my bags and we run as fast as we can to the station. I get there, I give him a big hug, I go to run towards to terminal and he grabs my arm, pulls me back to him and kisses me in the midst of the chaos right in front of Penn Station. It was like a movie moment in my life. It happened so fast and I'll never forget it. 

So we've had our cute moments throughout the years...the other one that comes to mind was my freshman year halloween. He was a senior and I was meeting him at the frat house to go to a party. I walk up looking all hot and ask this guy if he's seen Paul. 

Turns out it was Paul and for the rest of our lives he'd go, "Hey have you seen Paul??" 

Was cuter in real life ;) 

Ta ta for now!

Baby I am backkkkk.

xo xo, 

​Elle