Prepare yourself for what will likely be the the longest post of my life. The events I am about to describe are just one 24 hour period in my life. No embellishments, just straight idiocy at its finest.
Grab your snacks and enjoy the show.
The last we spoke I was geeking out over not hearing from Cyrus and Z cancelling the date...about five minutes later - there's a text from Cyrus and Z is texting up a storm...hmmm, all really is well?
I was getting ready for a lunch date with Jake when my phone buzzes, "Hey sexy face, happy "hump" day!" Cyrus for the winnnn!
That leads to some good midday chatter & he asks what I am doing tonight. I have plans with my friend to attend some rooftop event that he thinks I'll find some hot fellas at so I tell Cy I have plans but maybe can stop by after? He says sure, hit me up. Whew, main man done, pseudo date 3 kinda in the books all within 6 days...feeeeelin this.
Next up, texting with Z. He's fun, it's easy, we banter well, this could be legit...oh and hes SO hot. We talk all day and I find myself constantly smiling and laughing at my phone, yay he might be worth the wait!
Jake arrives and now it's time for lunch. We go grab mexican, hangout outside and discuss our beach trip. Post lunch he says he has a surprise he thinks I'll really like...
Hmmmm, what could this be???
We wind up at the animal shelter aka keys to my fucking heart. He knows I adore animals so this is an easy win. He indulges me and lets me pick up every kitten in the shelter, it was really adorable...major points.
He drops me at home and says to hit him up after the event. I decide I'll make it a game time decision...go to the event, come home around 9, text Cyrus, if he answers - head there & if not, go to Jake's across the street.
Fast forward -
I am getting ready for this event and Arash is hanging out in my bed. He goes, "Elle, if you weren't my roommate, we'd be doing some seriously dirty things right now, you look AMAZING."
My outfit was pretty fucking on point, not going to lie ;)
So my friend Adi shows up and we head over to this event. He then tells me Arash was emailing him today about possibly moving in together...ummmm what? what what whattttt the fuck!?
I thought we decided we were staying put? Are you kidding me. This sets me OFF. I have a few drinks & I am fuminggggg. All these guys are short as shit, I just want to get home and strangle Arash. So finally 9pm approaches, I tell Adi let's get home. As we are walking out I spot a tall, skinny fella in a suit who just so happens to be Jake's little brother. By little I mean he's my age.
We go up and chat, he's like we have to snap Jake, this is too good! He snaps a photo of us together & Jake replies, "nice! put in a good word." Jake's bro tells me how he won't let Jake mess it up this time and how he really is stoked about the opportunity to get me back. How cute, I am really seeing a new side to Jake...not mad about it. I love how much he cares and I love how good I feel when I am with him. It's not the same level as it is with Cyrus but it's still pretty great.
We depart, head home and I face Arash. Yep, I am still pissed. I call Cyrus ask if it's cool if I come over, sleep over and he drop me at home on his way to work (way to be forward, right?) He says that can be arranged and we're good to go.
Now here is where shit gets crazy...
I walk into my apartment, ignore Arash, call an uber, chug some champagne (why am I doing that? I'm already drunk), pack some pajamas and contact solution and depart.
I text Jake - "way too drunk, need to go to sleep, see you tomorrow night for sure xoxo"
I walk into Cyrus' apartment and there's his neighbor, Yoga girl. He told me she's always stopping by his place and she's tried to hook up with him many times and he just doesn't go for it. Interesting that she's here...I was looking forward to walking in, getting naked and falling asleep but I guessss I can have another drink....
Grab your snacks and enjoy the show.
The last we spoke I was geeking out over not hearing from Cyrus and Z cancelling the date...about five minutes later - there's a text from Cyrus and Z is texting up a storm...hmmm, all really is well?
I was getting ready for a lunch date with Jake when my phone buzzes, "Hey sexy face, happy "hump" day!" Cyrus for the winnnn!
That leads to some good midday chatter & he asks what I am doing tonight. I have plans with my friend to attend some rooftop event that he thinks I'll find some hot fellas at so I tell Cy I have plans but maybe can stop by after? He says sure, hit me up. Whew, main man done, pseudo date 3 kinda in the books all within 6 days...feeeeelin this.
Next up, texting with Z. He's fun, it's easy, we banter well, this could be legit...oh and hes SO hot. We talk all day and I find myself constantly smiling and laughing at my phone, yay he might be worth the wait!
Jake arrives and now it's time for lunch. We go grab mexican, hangout outside and discuss our beach trip. Post lunch he says he has a surprise he thinks I'll really like...
Hmmmm, what could this be???
We wind up at the animal shelter aka keys to my fucking heart. He knows I adore animals so this is an easy win. He indulges me and lets me pick up every kitten in the shelter, it was really adorable...major points.
He drops me at home and says to hit him up after the event. I decide I'll make it a game time decision...go to the event, come home around 9, text Cyrus, if he answers - head there & if not, go to Jake's across the street.
Fast forward -
I am getting ready for this event and Arash is hanging out in my bed. He goes, "Elle, if you weren't my roommate, we'd be doing some seriously dirty things right now, you look AMAZING."
My outfit was pretty fucking on point, not going to lie ;)
So my friend Adi shows up and we head over to this event. He then tells me Arash was emailing him today about possibly moving in together...ummmm what? what what whattttt the fuck!?
I thought we decided we were staying put? Are you kidding me. This sets me OFF. I have a few drinks & I am fuminggggg. All these guys are short as shit, I just want to get home and strangle Arash. So finally 9pm approaches, I tell Adi let's get home. As we are walking out I spot a tall, skinny fella in a suit who just so happens to be Jake's little brother. By little I mean he's my age.
We go up and chat, he's like we have to snap Jake, this is too good! He snaps a photo of us together & Jake replies, "nice! put in a good word." Jake's bro tells me how he won't let Jake mess it up this time and how he really is stoked about the opportunity to get me back. How cute, I am really seeing a new side to Jake...not mad about it. I love how much he cares and I love how good I feel when I am with him. It's not the same level as it is with Cyrus but it's still pretty great.
We depart, head home and I face Arash. Yep, I am still pissed. I call Cyrus ask if it's cool if I come over, sleep over and he drop me at home on his way to work (way to be forward, right?) He says that can be arranged and we're good to go.
Now here is where shit gets crazy...
I walk into my apartment, ignore Arash, call an uber, chug some champagne (why am I doing that? I'm already drunk), pack some pajamas and contact solution and depart.
I text Jake - "way too drunk, need to go to sleep, see you tomorrow night for sure xoxo"
I walk into Cyrus' apartment and there's his neighbor, Yoga girl. He told me she's always stopping by his place and she's tried to hook up with him many times and he just doesn't go for it. Interesting that she's here...I was looking forward to walking in, getting naked and falling asleep but I guessss I can have another drink....
Another drink turns into 4.
930pm turns into 230am.
Conversation is bleary, sex is occurring, everything is hazy.
Things I remember vaguely...
Asking if he has any dates or has had any dates this week -- he either said he had one or he has one. To this I believe I said, "ew, not a fan of that. "
Then he asked me about the STD thing again -- I assured him I am good to go...
Then I mentioned the whole "if you sleep with someone else" chat...I think I said, if you do, don't tell me - I don't want to know. And I thinkkkk he said he still would want to know....Can't be sure and no way can I ask.
I told him I really like him...he said he likes me too but we gotta pace ourselves, no kidding - what am I doing?! STF Elle!
We wake up at 7am...I am naked, he is clothed...he gets ready for work and I throw my pajamas on for the walk to his car. He drives me home and I apologize profusely... "I am so sorry for whatever I said last night, I didn't eat much and then I said all types of things I don't remember or probably even mean...I hope your date or dates or whatever are great, tons of fun, just the best...I hope you win your hockey game tonight, sorry again....blaaaaaa blaaaaaa." Yammering on like the idiot I am.
He assures me it's all good...I hop out and walk of shame it to my apartment where I find Arash. I tell him I am still mad at him and he needs to make a fucking decision. He says he's going to stay with me and that's it. Ugh, finally. Unless you change your mind for the 10000th time.
I text Jake that I am alive and I'll see him tonight...then I text Cyrus...
Me: "Ew God I am so grossed out with myself for the small amount of things I do remember saying...please, please omit everything from my record. I'm so bad at dating, sorry you had to deal with that pathetic reality & thanks a million for driving me home."
Cyrus: "Don't worry about it :)"
Me: "I'm beyond embarrassed, just toss out anything I said, please. And whatever discussion we had about dating, I'm so sorry lol ew ew ew who am I"
Cyrus: "Don't be embarrassed. I do appreciate the honestly, but consider it struck from the record."
Me: "Thank you. :) and honesty is completely overrated haha I need to avoid that like the plague."
Cyrus: "Haha, nah I wouldn't go that far"
Me: "As a triple p (his nickname for me prissy persian princess), I pride myself on keeping guys guessing - going to have to stop drinking forever haha"
Cyrus: "Haha, that sounds healthy, but very boring"
Me: "Going to be the healthiest haha just wait for it."
Cyrus: "You're already pretty healthy, except the whole meal skipping situation"
So we chatted for the rest of the day, nothing weird, praying I didn't do damage I can't reverse when I get home from California...
As for the food thing, I am going through a lot right now. I'm dating on a hyperactive wavelength, I am coping with the loss of XF, I am working, and working out and I just haven't been eating. It's not some ploy to be the skinniest bitch and make XF see what he's missing, I have no doubts he will realize that sooner or later...it's just this anxious feeling in my stomach and I have no appetite. I've lost a decent amount of weight despite drinking often and yeah, it's just been a crazy two weeks....I'm fine though.
So yeah - there is more details on pretty much everything but Jake's on the way over, I just shoveled pasta into my mouth in an attempt to not feel like complete shit from last night anddddd I need to get ready.
I was drunk at work all day with clients...lemme tell ya, NOT fun. I did eat an entire sandwhich + pasta just now though which is more food in a day than I've had in a week, progress!
The next post details the conversation I had with XFactor...it's a shitty one and it'll be another long ass post... sigh, stay tuned.
xo
Elle
930pm turns into 230am.
Conversation is bleary, sex is occurring, everything is hazy.
Things I remember vaguely...
Asking if he has any dates or has had any dates this week -- he either said he had one or he has one. To this I believe I said, "ew, not a fan of that. "
Then he asked me about the STD thing again -- I assured him I am good to go...
Then I mentioned the whole "if you sleep with someone else" chat...I think I said, if you do, don't tell me - I don't want to know. And I thinkkkk he said he still would want to know....Can't be sure and no way can I ask.
I told him I really like him...he said he likes me too but we gotta pace ourselves, no kidding - what am I doing?! STF Elle!
We wake up at 7am...I am naked, he is clothed...he gets ready for work and I throw my pajamas on for the walk to his car. He drives me home and I apologize profusely... "I am so sorry for whatever I said last night, I didn't eat much and then I said all types of things I don't remember or probably even mean...I hope your date or dates or whatever are great, tons of fun, just the best...I hope you win your hockey game tonight, sorry again....blaaaaaa blaaaaaa." Yammering on like the idiot I am.
He assures me it's all good...I hop out and walk of shame it to my apartment where I find Arash. I tell him I am still mad at him and he needs to make a fucking decision. He says he's going to stay with me and that's it. Ugh, finally. Unless you change your mind for the 10000th time.
I text Jake that I am alive and I'll see him tonight...then I text Cyrus...
Me: "Ew God I am so grossed out with myself for the small amount of things I do remember saying...please, please omit everything from my record. I'm so bad at dating, sorry you had to deal with that pathetic reality & thanks a million for driving me home."
Cyrus: "Don't worry about it :)"
Me: "I'm beyond embarrassed, just toss out anything I said, please. And whatever discussion we had about dating, I'm so sorry lol ew ew ew who am I"
Cyrus: "Don't be embarrassed. I do appreciate the honestly, but consider it struck from the record."
Me: "Thank you. :) and honesty is completely overrated haha I need to avoid that like the plague."
Cyrus: "Haha, nah I wouldn't go that far"
Me: "As a triple p (his nickname for me prissy persian princess), I pride myself on keeping guys guessing - going to have to stop drinking forever haha"
Cyrus: "Haha, that sounds healthy, but very boring"
Me: "Going to be the healthiest haha just wait for it."
Cyrus: "You're already pretty healthy, except the whole meal skipping situation"
So we chatted for the rest of the day, nothing weird, praying I didn't do damage I can't reverse when I get home from California...
As for the food thing, I am going through a lot right now. I'm dating on a hyperactive wavelength, I am coping with the loss of XF, I am working, and working out and I just haven't been eating. It's not some ploy to be the skinniest bitch and make XF see what he's missing, I have no doubts he will realize that sooner or later...it's just this anxious feeling in my stomach and I have no appetite. I've lost a decent amount of weight despite drinking often and yeah, it's just been a crazy two weeks....I'm fine though.
So yeah - there is more details on pretty much everything but Jake's on the way over, I just shoveled pasta into my mouth in an attempt to not feel like complete shit from last night anddddd I need to get ready.
I was drunk at work all day with clients...lemme tell ya, NOT fun. I did eat an entire sandwhich + pasta just now though which is more food in a day than I've had in a week, progress!
The next post details the conversation I had with XFactor...it's a shitty one and it'll be another long ass post... sigh, stay tuned.
xo
Elle
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