Frustrations.

1. XF hasn't contacted me, so much for "I can't live without you" - looks like ya can, jackass.
2. Cyrus hasn't texted...IDK if thats a warning sign? We did go on two dates in a short timespan so maybe I'm just confused and overthinking all of it? At this point, I don't think I'm going to get to see him before I go...womp.

3. Z needs to reschedule Thursday which BLOWS. I'm gone next week to Cali land and there goes that momentum. Aghhhhh! Cyrus has hockey on Thursdays so it's not like seeing him is even an option.

4. In California I'm going to have to write about some general dating shit because as of right now, I don't plan to do any tindering over there. I mightttt change my mind, but its unlikely. 

5. I'll likely see Jake tonight, might as well since the other two are not panning out accordingly.

So am I just reallllly out of the game? If you've had two solid dates with a guy, is it weird to talk everyday? Or do you reserve the talking everyday card for when you've decided to be in a relationship?? I haven't been in post second date, awaiting 3rd date territory in quite sometime but when I step back and think about it...we met last Thursday and already completed date 2...typically 1x week is normal, I do know that much so 3 dates in 1 week might be moving a bit too fast? 

Ugh, so complicateddddddd. I know we had a connection. I know he likes me. He couldn't hide that even if he tried. But maybe he is trying? Or maybe he was seeing someone a little bit before me so now he's kind of got two girls and doesn't know what to do? I feel like that's not the case only because he said it'd be better to tell each other if we sleep with someone else vs the don't ask, don't tell policy....

Arash says, "if he wants it (aka me), he'll get it so don't say anything and let him come to you." I'm a pro at waiting for the guy to reach out, I just don't want to play this game. I am also worried I'll lose momentum with him and I was really hoping for one more opportunity to show him what he'll be missing while I'm gone so that his mind is on me during the week I am away. Also, if he ghosts me now...I WILL BE SO LIVID. 

Fuck!
As you can see - here I am overthinking the hell out of this. I swear, the second a girl likes a boy, all rational logic goes FLYING out the window. Why can't the same be true of when a guy likes a girl? TELL ME THAT UNIVERSE, TELL ME THAT. You don't see dating blogs written by guys now do ya!? There is a reason for that, main one being - guys are morons.

Also, I am really so angry XF doesn't try to text me at the very least or send pathetic emails. It's salt in my wounds after 2+ years of fighting every single person in his defense. 

So stay tuned for how things unfold....At least we know Jake isn't going anywhere. 

xo 

​Elle