We are missing the opportunity to live blog/tweet 

GROOMZILLA'S NUPTIALS TODAY! 

I'm kindaaaa at the point where I don't give a fuck and could easily post some of the corny ass things that will surely be popping up all weekend on my newsfeed and insta (aka giving away their identities)...

Yeah, actually - consider that done.

Since I can't be there to witness this disgusting shit show and entertain you with it, I will def keep up with their social media, I am doing this for YOU my loyal readers.  

Get excited for a weekend of gag worthy, groomzilla-ness.

PS XFactor had gained so much weight his suit for this didn't fit when I dumped him in August, wonder if the breakup helped aid him in getting slim or if he had to buy a new suit? 

Hmmmm....

Probably still fat.

xo,

Elle

When you ask your closest friends to check their phone books...

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL.
(this is why I never save their numbers, no clogging up my phonebook, TOADS.) 

New Year's is great & all but I am a firm believer in the birthday resolutions. New Year's resolutions are the easiest not to keep, but a birthday resolution - well, that's (IMO) much easier and more personal. 

A few of my goals during my 27th year were:

1. Figure out wtf I was doing with X Factor, are we engaged or is this a bust? --> Successfully made a final decision and as we know, it was bust.
2. Be in better shape by 28 than I was at 27. --> This has fluctuated a ton. The scale told me I was the heaviest I'd ever been, I saw a photo from a wedding in Chicago that petrified me, and presently - my clothes are loose and I feel good. It's a day to day struggle for me though. I definitely know endurance wise I have improved so I think I am heading into 28 with this goal checked off. 
3. Be more ontop of my businesses. --> I'll check that off, I successfully raised my rates and didn't lose anyone when doing so - thats a W in my book. 
4. Be a better friend --> No idea if I accomplished this or not...No major fall outs occurred with anyone but it's hard to be a judge of that for myself. 
5. Be more fearless & stop caring what others thing --> DEFINITE check. I give so many less fucks now than ever before. Last year at this time, I was censoring my IG because the Armenian mafia was stalking me, I took the blog down because I was scared it'd be found and ruin me, etc. Now, I don't care. If some racist Armenian fuck wants to judge me, go right ahead. If anyone else wants to judge, go for it. 

NO FUCKS TO BE GIVEN HERE. 

​6. To be continued....

Jake told me last night in bed that he got me a birthday gift...he randomly brought it up as we were canoodling in bed...

What do we think it could beeeeeeee?

This is the same Jake whom I split the bill with, always. And the same one that I busted my ass to get a ticket to his sold out boat party birthday, a ticket that cost $50 mind you...and oh yeah THEN, I accidentally cheated on XF with him THUS making him the happiest, ever. AND me showing up was a total surprise because I am just that awesome.

soooooo let's hear it! 

Ummm...What do you do when your first boyfriend literally EVER hits you up on facebook chat? 

Cue jaw drop.

Guys, my 6th grade boyfriend was E V E R Y T H I N G back in the day. We were so obsessed with each other it was sickening. Super sickening actually. We did everything together, wrote each other lovey dovey little notes/poems/songs, made out everywhere, Blink182 concerts, Warped tour, ski club buddies, I went to his hockey games on the weekends, endless hours on AIM...

I WAS OBSESSED.

He was too though. This gem was also the first guy to ever cheat on me. Yep, you read it right. My 6th-8th grade boyfriend cheated on me. We named the bitch he kissed Sammy Poofster. When I found out (the bitch AIM'd me and told me) the ENTIRE school found out and EP was exiled. Teachers were so upset, I mean outrage ensued. Nobody would talk to him. Sammy Poofster went to a different school and I was loved at my middle school, loved to the point that I ran for class president. (Popular always, DUH) Anyways, our break up was complete shit and I was devastated.

So naturally, I dated two of his best friends thus ensuring he now REALLY had no friends. 

I learned early on that anyone who dares fuck with me better watch their back because I will destroy you. (RAWR)

Gosh, these are the moments when I miss my X bestfriend Esther. She is the only person who could truly appreciate EP coming back into my life randomly, Sammy Poofster and the exile...

ANYWAYS - I moved away after middle school and that was the end of the EP/Elle mixtape. 

Fast forward to 2016 - 

I get this message at midnight last night, "Hey Elle, how are you?" 

EP?!?! Jesus, I haven't thought about you in YEARS. 
"Hey! Isn't this a blast from the past?" 

He is now a filmmaker in Boston. He teaches and also does actual tv/film production. After reminiscing for an hour he tells me he will be in Annapolis this weekend for a TV show he's filming and if he has time would like to see me. 

Cue allll the childhood nostalgia.

This guy was most definitely my first love. Granted it wasn't the deep, intense love you feel nowadays when sex is involved but it was the first feeling of emotional attachment towards a boy I'd ever had. 

Oh and sidenote - he remembers my birthday, "one of those dates I just can't forget" -- yep, I made a huge deal out of it even in 6th/7th/8th grade, typical Elle. AND his phone number has stayed the same since 6th grade...the only number I ever remembered/was the first # in my first cell phone. 

This all being said -- we did meet up in college once. He went to a school 1hr from mine and I went up there to visit. I don't think we ever had sex BUT it was so long ago, we very well might have. 

Anyhow, I find this all kinda crazy. I do hope to see him, catching up with someone who knew me way back when I had frizzy hair, braces and a giant nose, and loved me anyways...always fun times. 

He said he'd text me today to let me know his schedule...Sooooo here's another one of those plot twists that makes life oh so interesting!

Cest la vie,

Elle

​PS He's single right now too....

Whew, what a wild couple of weeks its been...So many failed dates in just over a month of singleness...How do I do it?

Luckily, these toads are tools so they make it easy on me.

Let's recap...

Since August 10th when I dumped XF on his ass...

August 13 - First weekend of singleness was Jaddo, my Lebanese millionaire who I have hooked up with during every break up since 2012. We only kissed & danced. (he's miserable in bed) He however has the best taste in everything so we always have a good time AND he's loaded. $$$

August 15 - Jake returns. I Had a work event that he was my date to the year before and decided to invite him again thus kicking off this love affair.

August 18 - First tinder date back in the game, Cyrus. AMAZING guy who ghosted me after date 4. 

August 27 - Groupers in Cali: round 1 - Danial and Moe. My date was Danial - the guy who was sucking my face off after 30 seconds and proceeded to stalk me afterwards aka lunatic. 

August 30 - round 2 - Ali/Rami & M - Ali, my original date ditched me mid date because I was texting and utterly bored to tears by him. He was replaced by sexpot Rami who I proceeded to sleep with and still keep in touch with. He wants to come to the east coast next month...not mad at it ;) So that was only a half failed date.

(then lots of Jake time) 

September 8 - Ram, Kanye West concert. 

September 9- Final date with Cyrus, womp, womp.

September 11- Naj, nice guy who took me to the wine bar - good personality, not attracted to him whatsoever. Keeps bugging for date 2...

September 14 - Meltdown over XF, called him sobbing.

September 20 - Date with Lex, jackass who was only trying to fuck me.

September 21 - First/last date with Shady, FOB ass Egyptian whom I only lasted 20 minutes with before fleeing. THEN Last date with Lex where I refused to fuck him.

September 22 - Workout with Jake & friends then Pdiddy concert with Ram. 

September 23 - Double date with Mia and the toads we ran from, slept with Jake after.

September 24 - Coffee date with PJ the Persian toad who only had 30 minutes to spare...fucking loser.

September 25 - Third date with Ram, played pool, had dinner, & worst first kiss evaaaaa. Later, Arash arrived home from a 10 day vaca.

This week? DATE FREE! 

I am fucking exhausted. I told all the toads I am traveling for work and can't see them except for Jake. I am tired of the juggling. Clearly putting myself out there has gotten me literally nowhere because the guy I like the most is the only guy I didn't meet on tinder. (Jake)

Gimme an A for effort? 

Fuck. It's crazy how much dating I've done with zero return on investment. Granted, I did sleep with 3 guys in 1 month which is a world record for me. Sorry not sorry, it was much needed after two years of terrible sex with XF. Also, all 3 were bomb in bed so that really was the bright side to all this dating/waste of makeup.

Things are heating up with Jake (he actually just left), I can't help it even if I tried...I know I should hit the brakes but I don't want to...

PS Jake said he'd write a blog post for me about me..."the male perspective on falling in love with Elle..."

However - if he does that, he will be able to find the blog via search engine SO I am going to have to re-word the fuck out of it. Should be interesting if he follows through or not...

xoxo
Elle

PS the day I return from our girls trip to Miami marks 2 official months XFactor free...this is the longest I have ever gone without seeing him. Let's see what kinda trouble I can get into before then ;)

LASTLY - Podcast launches after Miami...I have quite the agenda for it, promise you're gonna loveeeeeeee it! 

​So you heard about the Thursday and Friday shenanigans. After a fun Saturday night out with Elle and Double Trouble, we grabbed a tasty brunch Sunday morning. I had been talking with another Tinder gent throughout the week who said we should try to get together on Sunday for drinks but hadn’t yet heard from him. We’ll call him Doug. After brunch, the three of us headed back to Elle’s place where our guy friend met us and I was explaining the situation. Guy friend says just text him to see if we’re still on, I get a text back and our date is set for a cute little outdoor spot. It’s a beautiful fall night and I’m kind of excited, though I do know to go in with low expectations.
 
I walk in and see him, and he looks even cuter in person. Tall, handsome, bright blue eyes, bit of a scruff … I like what I see.  I order a drink and the date begins. We’re talking with ease, chatting about everything and anything, laughing, drinking. I’m thinking, this might be the best first date I’ve ever been on. (I’m also wondering if that’s actually the case or if I’ve just been on so many bad/mediocre dates lately that a halfway decent one seems amazing.)
 
We talked about our families, our interests, where we see ourselves and what we want in life. And it seems like we want a lot of the same things. He also kept saying really cute little things like: he knows a really great dinner spot he wants to take me on our second date or that he looks great in a suit and is a fabulous wedding date (we chatted about upcoming friends’ weddings). Some of his rhetoric did come off as rather smooth, but also genuine. I excuse myself to the bathroom about halfway through the date to use the ladies room and text Elle: “omg omg omg omg. He’s so cute and so funny and I’m having the best time.”
 
We’re talking some more and chat about Tinder, I find out I’m his second Tinder date ever. That sets off a small warning bell and lots of questions cross my mind … is he cautious about who he actually goes out with? Is he just recently back on the market? If so, is he just looking to date or sleep around? He also hinted at a long vacation with an ex and her family last December and losing Netflix in “the divorce” so something is definitely up with an ex that seems like it may have been long term, need to find out more info there.
 
We ended up talking for about three hours before we called it. We pretty much shut the restaurant/patio where we were down and it was a Sunday night so we both had to work the next day. He paid for the bill (I offered, he was surprised and asked if guys actually make girls pay sometimes and thought that was ridiculous… swoon), he walked me to my car (double swoon) and he held my hand on our little walk (triple swoon).
 
When we got to my car, he pulled me close and said “I had a really great time tonight, I’d love to see you again. Can we do something again sometime this week?” I said yes, I’d love that as well and that I had an awesome time too. Then he was just staring at me smiling for a split second and went in for a kiss. And Oh. My. God. It was an insane kiss. One of those passionate yet soft, aggressive yet sensual, fireworks-exploding, heart-fluttering, is-this-really-happening-right-now kind of kisses. After we pull away he goes “Wow, that’s the best first kiss I’ve ever had, I’m looking forward to more of that. … so much so that I’m going to have to kiss you again.” And leans right back in.  So yeah, I had a great date with a great guy, and we shared a GREAT kiss. He asked me to text when I got home so I did, he reiterated that he wanted to see me again soon (and how great the kiss was) and wished me a good night.
 
… the day after...

Mia here, I’m back.
Where did we last leave off with my love life … or lack thereof?

Quick recap: Speed dating from hell, a couple of guys who couldn’t execute plans and getting stood up … twice. Suffice to say, I needed to take a dating break. I was so sick of the online toads and chose to shift my focus to things I wanted to do: have fun with my friends and travel. Maybe try meeting some people in person? They say it happens when you least expect it, right? Lofty goals, I know.

Spoiler alert: Still single, still looking … and now I’m back on the Tinder train.
 
Thankfully, Elle is right there with me now and so is our other bff Double Trouble. This may be the first time we’ve all been single, aggressively dating and not giving two fucks — and it’s great. Even better? It means I have some entertaining stories to share as well.
 
I booked myself an aggressive weekend of dates. Thursday, Friday, potential Saturday and Sunday. I was impressed with myself, but I really just needed to get over the hump, suck it up and get the hell out there. And I did.
 
Ok Thursday night: Wesley. Executive chef, 34, 6’4” … seemed cute and active in his photos. We had some good conversation on the app and he executed in asking me out pretty quickly, which I appreciated. (Boys, take note … one of the worst things you can do if you’re interested in a gal is string her along with talk and talk and no action. ASK. HER. OUT. Give her a time a date and a place and PLAN. AHEAD. It’s not that difficult. It’s also a HUGE pet peeve of mine. #endrant). We go to a bar for drinks. He walks in, is definitely tall like his photos but … he’s bald. Definitely wasn’t in his photos but oh well, I can deal. He greets me with THE most awkward half hug side kiss I have ever encountered. I think … ohhhhh boy.

Long story short (I won’t bore you too much with this one) he talked mostly about himself, I was asking all the questions and he barely asked questions about me. Yawn. The date ends, he doesn’t walk me to my car but just to the corner and again we exchange an UBER awkward side hug/cheek kiss. Obviously wasn’t meant to be but you gotta start somewhere, right?
 
Now on to Friday … the dreaded double date with Elle.
 
I was looking forward to this one, I thought it’d be fun to do a double with my bff and we had gotten confirmation from Jake that the one gent was tall and good looking. Plus the dude had been in touch with Elle all week, confirmed a date and time and was following through. What ensued was hilarity, to say the least.
 
The boys called Elle and said they were on the way to the bar, we were coming from the same neighborhood so they asked if we wanted a ride. Elle said yes and (after struggling with directions…) they finally made it to Elle’s. Yes, we met these toads for the first time in an Uber. The supposedly “tall” and “good looking” toad gets out of the car … and is a solid 2-3 inches shorter than me. (I’m 5’7” which isn’t *that* tall … at this point, seems like Jake knew what he was doing here) and his friend is basically a mute. Tinder toad #1 is talking the whole ride about who knows what, tinder toad #2 says maybe five words the entire time. We arrive at the bar and Elle and I excuse ourselves to go to the bathroom.

​THANKFULLY we were thinking the same thing: How the hell are we going to get out of this snoozefest? Elle is two steps ahead of me and has already concocted a plan. We’ll stay for a drink and then execute our planned exit. We end up sucking our drinks down pretty quickly, entertain the toads for 15-20 minutes, then I say I have a call I have to take outside, text Elle and say I fell down the stairs and twisted my ankle pretty badly and that I called an Uber to go home because it hurt so bad. She shows the Tinder toads the texts and says she has to go check on me, they say they’ll follow she says no! but apparently they started to follow … she sprints down the stairs and meets me on the street and we literally sprint away from them. #sorrynotsorry
 
So that’s the latest on my trials and tribulations. Saturday’s ended up being a no-show. Sunday’s was actually … dare I say … promising?
 
That’s all for now, stay tuned for the details on Sunday’s date and more!
 
Xo
Mia

 Im sorry!!! I am the worst, I really didn't mean to take such a hiatus - I have barely had time to sleep let alone blog.

Thursday: Went to the gym with A, her bf, & Jake. That was fun because we kicked their asssssses and gained a whole new level of respect from both fellas. After class I dropped them off as fast as possible and bolted into the shower then to the Pdiddy concert with Ram. 

He was nice as always, concert was great, we planned to see each other Saturday. No chemistry still but hey, whatever. He is definitely my top candidate for tinder friend. 

Friday: Hang with Jake during the day. Nothing exciting...

Friday PM: double date with Mia and the two worst toads EVER. Mia is going to author an entire post on this so I won't give anything away...it was BAD. 

Late Friday PM: Jake comes over. I'm pretty wasted...he doesn't seem to mind though. I whine to him, "why can't you want what I want in lifeeeeeee?" 
Jake: "Elle, we want the same things its about WHEN we want them."
Me: "I can't wait 10 years Jakeeeeeee."
Jake: "It's not about 10 years, it's about being financially stable and setting myself up for that stage of life. I'm working on it but I am not there. I wanna marry a girl like you, I want kids."
Me: "IDK what to doooooooooo"
Starts kissing me, clothes coming off, stumbling into my bedroom and the case is closed, I officially forgot anything I was whining about. 

Who needs kids and a husband when the sex is just this good? 

Saturday: Coffee date with a new persian toad. PJ. He was fine, nothing exciting, nothing bad but then after 30 minutes, "I need to get back to my neighborhood now, it was nice meeting you!" 

and abruptly, he's gone.

What the fuck? It was a totally normal date...I am so confused. Was there food in my teeth? HUH? 

Guess I'm not as good at this as I thought? 

Whatever, onto the next. 

Off to costco I go...part of my independence plan was signing up for my own membership...something I had dreaded doing because it was something I always did and enjoyed with X Factor. 

I almosttttt started crying while signing the paperwork...luckily, I didn't. Made me so bitter towards XF though. I can't believe I have to endure these dating disasters all over again, you fucker. 

Saturday PM: Gal pals come over and we head to G's house. He entertains us as always and we decide to hit up a local bar for a bit after. Meet 0 potentials, head home and pass out. 


Sunday: date with Ram that I had zero interest in going on. No concert, no care.

He asks if I'd like to play ping pong.

UMMMMM...this is a joke, right? 

I say no and suggest we do something close to my house instead...let's keep this non concert date as brief as possible.

He is very nice but it's as if I am hanging out with a high school kid, he's just so young/innocent in my eyes... So turns out he is pretty religious which is why he doesn't drink. I can respect it but I can't date it. 

We play billiards, have dinner and he walks me to my car where he FINALLY kisses me. 
It was terrible. No skills whatsoever, send help. 

He invites me to the Jason Aldean concert Saturday, I decline and he says to let him know when I am free next. Ugh, is it mean to say I'm free when the next Capitals game is? He has free box seats via work so it's no cost out of pocket and he's always got the best seat in town. 

Was supposed to see Jake after date with Ram and before picking up Arash from the airport but sadly ran out of time so I called him instead. We chatted for an hour, was a good talk then off I go to get Arash. 

Stay tuned for my revelations about my feelings toward Arash (aka my roommate), 2 MIA guest posts, Jake updates, TinderToad updates, clearing the roster & MIAMI planning for my 28th year. 

xo

Elle

Alright soooooo after a major work event, a 20 minute date with a toad I had no real desire to meet I agreed to see Lex again. 

He met me near my house for a quick dinner...this was Wednesday, the night after date 1. 

All was good all day, normal texts, etc. 

Then we sit down and start chatting...

I learn...
He was married and annulled at 28. So he lied when I asked if he had been married before...
That is kind of a huge deal breaker for me.... I get pretty quiet and try to diagnose this information...

Then sex comes up... 

Well, he has a major foot fetish. Likes a girls feet in his line of sight during sex and as close to his youknowwhat as possible....ummmm, what the fuck, weird...

I tell him I have no plans of sleeping with him in the near future so FYI...

Then he says I look tired and we should get going so I can get some sleep. Ah, totally agree - this has been a lot for one night. 

He walks me to my car and I mention how all the religious symbols he has in his house kind of freak me out...He is NOT a fan of that. In every single window and on every table there is something religious. It is so intense and unlike anything I've ever seen before... 

He doesn't try to kiss me and says bye.

Hmmmm...I am so tired, I don't really even care at this point. Get me to bed. 

Last night after I returned from the Bad Boy Reunion concert with Ram, I get a text at 12:22am...

"Hey there,I don't think we are a good match and don't see myself spending more time with you. Hope you find what it is you're looking for."

Well, I had prayed that God would tell me what to do with this one...clearly that resolved itself at warp speed (Thank you God, not in the mood for wasting time). 

Oh and did I mention he had the worlds smallest penis, EVER? 
I was worried about that too but hey, I wanted to give a guy a chance. 

Anyhoo - I didn't reply, I am not upset, he's a weirdo and I am really glad I didn't waste my spare time with a guy who really was just trying to fuck me. 

Lots of new dates coming up, stay tuned! 

xo

Elle

What happens when you find a guy who is everything you'd been looking for + a little more? 

You freak out because it wasn't supposed to happen this soon, you're enjoying the single life ALOT and you might combust because OF COURSE the timing isn't right. 

Meet Lex.
Egyptian, high profile lawyer, 6ft, impeccable dresser, very confident, 37, great kisser. 

Yeah, he checked off literally every box. 
Isn't seeking his parents approval
Wants to get married ASAP and have kids
Wants his wife to stay at home if she wants to (I do, I do!)
Is down to move to California 
Owns a house and an insane car
Wears Prada shoes
Enjoys the finer things in life
Great sexual chemistry (no we didn't have sex)
Opens every door, always
Is super fucking into me andddddd

I AM SCARED!! 

What in the world is wrong with me?! He takes me on an amazing date to the Four Seasons, out for drinks elsewhere after, back to his house that is gigantic that he owns....tells me I am exactly what he's been looking for and has no intention of not winning the battle of the tinder toads. 

He is SO intense though.
I know good things can happen fast but I also know when something starts too fast it ends too fast. Which is why despite reaaaaallly wanting to, I didn't sleep with him. 

I told him I really do want to give this a chance with him but if it's full speed ahead, I know it's gonna fizzle. I'll either lose interest, it won't be enough of a chase for me or I'll get scared and run. 

I need something like him to develop SLOWLY. 

Cyrus was full speed and look how that ended. I don't want that again...I also don't want to jump into a relationship and in six months realize I still really needed to be single because I have doubts about Lex who COULD be a great match but I am doubting it because it happened too fast. Woke up single and the next day woke up engaged. He literally said that within 6 months you know whether or not you're gonna marry the person and he's not fucking around. I appreciate a guy who can execute but I KNOWWWW I'm not ready to fall in love again just yet. I am still in love with XFactor and developing useless feelings towards Jake.  

So basically, I had the perfect date with an amazing guy. 

But I am an idiot because...

I keep thinking about Jake. The guy with no potential. 

Mentally, I think I might be sabotaging myself. 

Like I don't think I deserve a guy as accomplished as Lex, he's too far ahead of me and I don't bring enough to the table. 

Then there's Jake who I am on even playing field with...slash not even, I am above. So I am the power player, shot caller, and bread winner as of this moment. The marriage + kids wouldn't be in the cards for at least another 5 years. 

With XF, I felt similar feelings of...wow, I don't speak 4 languages fluently, I haven't traveled half as much, I don't have a masters degree, I don't have a trust fund. Eventually, I realized the things I DO have that aren't on paper were worth a lot too. And I got past it.

Maybe I can do that with Lex? 

It's just so soon. IDK if I am ready for potential husband. He wants to lock it down, only see each other. When I asked why, his response was perfection. 

"Say 1 out of 10 dates you actually have a connection with. That takes what? A minimum of let's say 10 weeks. And that's just someone who can hold a conversation, they might not check off all the boxes. I meet someone like you, who I have been waiting for my entire life and no way do I want to risk losing that one, you are definitely more than a 1 in 10 connection." 

FUCK. 

Things change so fast around here, my head is sppppppinnnning. 

I have a date with some other Egyptian tonight, Thursday I have a workout with Jake then the concert with Ram, Friday is a double with Mia, Saturday I think is Lex again? 

I'm not ready to only be seeing one person. I am not ready to say bye to Jake and break his heart again. I am just not ready for any major life decisions right now. 

AHHHHHH ELLE DONT FUCK THIS UP. 

What do I do!? 

Elle

Except that I rolled my ankle a few weeks ago and my standards have been slipping just as my heel wearing has taken a hiatus.

ffffucccckkkkkk.
​
Fair warning - this will be a stream of consciousness post and likely won't make the most sense. 

​Where did we leave off? 
Oh yeah, sobbing about XFactor on Wednesday. That's right...such fun times...

So Thursday was the busiest work day of my life which gave me zero time to think about XF and Cyrus and then before I know it, Friday had arrived. THANK GOD.

Go to the gym, get ready as fast as possible and off to a double date with A, her bf, & Jake. Reminder - Jake and A's bf live together so this is a pretty tight knit grouping. 

We grab dinner and go bowling. I pay for my dinner, he doesn't even attempt...guess this is really the norm with this guy...such is life, it's not like I can't afford my own meal...

Get to bowling and all they serve is beer. UGH, my least favorite thing. So the girls buy the beer, the guys buy the bowling and it begins. 

First off, this bowling alley is ghetto as fuck, cold as fuck and dirty as fuck. NOT Elle approved in the slightest. I am used to bougey bowling....dark, EDM/Pop music, clean glow in the dark balls, waitresses and VODKA. 

There was NONE of that. No music to be heard. KILL ME NOW.

We get through game one and I am ready to G O. 

Oh no ya don't Elle, A's boyfriend loves bowling and they bought the unlimited package so we are committed until 1am. It's currently 11pm. HOLY GOD can I do this. 

I chug some beer in hopes of warming up and hope that these hours will fly by. Mind you, I love the company of this group - we are having a great time but I am so cold and out of my element, I just want to go home. 

Jake's being super cuddly and sweet. All the touchy feely cutsy shit. Towards the end of the night, I put my hands in his pockets with my arms wrapped around him...something I'd done 10x prior that night and he suddenly freaks out. "Get your hands out of my pockets!!!" 

Ummmm...wtf, I've done this so many times, why now are you freaking out? So weird. Not a fan of this. Time to go. WTF.

We get in the car and I proceed to ignore him and talk to A the whole way. We get to my house and he asks if he can sleepover. Ugh, IDK I'm kinda drunk and salty towards you right now...but fineeee. 

We get home, have sex and then get into a deep discussion about how I am the girl he has slept with the most consistently...Ummmmm...so that is a huge deal. You are 29 and I am your most consistent hook up? Hot damn this is training wheels x 100000000. IDK if I am cut out for this. 

He's never been in love so I'd be his first...that means you get this incredible power to transform and mold them into the guy you want but you also have to do ALL the work. He won't understand heartbreak and sacrifice like you do, he won't know what it takes to KEEP a girl like you. That stuff can't be taught...I know that all too well...

Do I really want a project THIS big? 
Could I get him to fall deep and hard enough to want to get married and have kids in the next few years? 
Is it a risk I am willing to take? 
How attached is he already? 

Oh LAWDY. I feel myself getting attached as each day goes on...sex definitely fucks with your logic and my oh my is it goooooood. My brain is turning to mush for even considering legitimately dating him. 

Stay tuned for the rest of the weekend...I am falling asleep typing which can only mean, this post is getting boring fast. 

xo xo 
​Elle

There will be a TON of new content this week - I was extremely busy last week + the weekend but I am not going to fall off, don't you worry! Stay tuned for it.

Til then....

WEEK OF September 19 - 25, 2016Tie up those loose ends—and fasten them with a double knot. You’re ready to leave the past behind you as Libra season begins this Thursday, September 22. With the Sun cruising through your sign until October 22—and joining abundant Jupiter there to boot—you are ready to leap into exciting new terrain. The past month may have brought some heavy vibes—with the Sun in your introspective twelfth house—but now it’s time to shake ’em off and move on. Your independent spirit is desperate for a turn at the wheel and once you shift into drive you will leave the haters and naysayers in the dust. Their constant critiques are no longer of value to you. With the Sun and Jupiter buoying your well-deserved confidence, the opinion you should be listening to is your own. You’re a people person, Libra, but your birthday month is a great time to fly solo and pursue your individual interests. For once you might actually enjoy a solo vacation to reconnect to “me, myself and I.” How about a surf-and-yoga retreat at an exotic beach locale? Explore local offerings and meetups. You could be surprised at the number of clubs and kindred spirits within biking distance. But don’t rush to commit or fill out membership applications. Use these next four weeks to check out all your options and expand your horizons. Expect to feel more energized—and impatient. Burn off that angst with some physical activity. Treat yourself to some private sessions with a Pilates instructor or personal trainer; maybe get a ClassPass to sample a buffet of local studios. During Libra season, you can’t go wrong by investing in your personal development.
Also on Thursday, the communication planet, silver-tongued Mercury, ends a frustrating three-week retrograde in your twelfth house of forgiveness, release and endings. The fog is lifting, Libra—and just in time! Since August 30, there may have been times you couldn’t see ten feet ahead of you. And the emotional chaos has threatened to be your undoing. Some Libras danced with a few demons and deep-cleaned a key area of life. But now, as Mercury resumes forward motion, the lesson starts to become clear: Put up better boundaries or tear down the wall for good! Some people will push and push, and you’re not so good in the tough-love department. A little self-discipline is also in order, especially if you’ve allowed your hedonistic and romantic sides to overindulge. You’ll benefit from work with compassionate healers and mentors now, so book some sessions or ask friends for recommendations. Even a weekly massage would be restorative while Mercury lingers in Virgo until October 7. At the very least, take time out for a pedicure in between all your decluttering missions.
Flirt alert! A dazzling new chapter opens on Friday, when Venus, the zodiac’s love planet—and your ruler—shimmies into Scorpio and your second house of sensuality and luxury until October 18. Stop in your stiletto tracks and take time to smell the roses. After a busy year, slowing down will help your mojo rise. You’re ready for some sultry times, but first, bliss out with a few healthy indulgences like hot-stone massage, spa pedicures or a trip to the haute hair salon. Your sign has an affinity for aesthetic beauty, but tune in to your other senses as well. Swaddle yourself in a cashmere shawl, burn scented candles while you toss some new spices into your food. In love, you’ll be attracted to traditional (yet smoldering under the collar) types. Those “nice” types who seemed a little boring last week could legitimately win your heart before Halloween. (It’s a treat, not a trick…we swear.) Already attached? Stabilize your bond by getting a weekly date night on the calendar—that’s how you’ll guarantee some proper sexytime goes down. And make your S.O. feel like a priority by heading home earlier (or at least on time!) from your bazillion social engagements. Since the second house rules income, this Venus cycle underscores the importance of networking. Load your wallet with business cards and hit the party circuit. You might not seal the deal at the martini bar, but following up the next day could lead to a prosperous alliance.

The final rose goes to....

Tinder.

100% of responses voted, keep swiping. 

Sigh.

I have made it quite clear to Cyrus that I like him. Not in a clingy/psycho way -- but it's out there. 

I texted him Saturday night, "wish you were coming dancing with me ;)"

Sunday 11:30am reply: "Can you light up a dancefloor?"

The rest - useless chatter about nothing important. 

Since? Absafuckinglutely nothing. Not a word.

Normally, I wouldn't mind initiating but as clearly stated in the book/movie "He's Just Not That Into You" - if a guy wants to see you, he will. If a guy wants to talk to you, he will. 

Sooooooo the writing is on the wall. He's not too busy with work or hockey to send a text, there is zero excuse in the tech age to not stay in touch...which meanssssss, he's just not that into me. 

Womp, womp, womp, womppppppp. :(

I guess my first tinder date back on the scene was too good to be true. I just wish I knew where I went wrong/if it's the girl he slept with while I was away that stole my thunder. Sadly, there is no way to know so I just gotta get the fuck over it. 

I've seen Jake everyday, he took me out for ice cream on Tuesday (& he paid) and yesterday I ran over there for a quick sexual rendezvous before going out...the sex is better every single time...I asked him if it was this good last summer and he agreed it wasn't. "Why do think it's so good now?" Him: "Because I lost you and now I have you again and it makes me appreciate it all a lot more." Awwwwwww. I know we are discussing sex but hey, that was sweet. 

Last night - had a fancy work even with Mia, we set up a tinder group date for after and these idiots bailed. Which was SUPER annoying/severely pissed me off. In Cali, groupers on weeknights were so easy -- in DC, all these guys are so self important they can't commit to a goddamn plan. Not cool toads, not cool. 

We had been drinking aggressively...free champagne is not something we take lightly so by the time I got home, I was pretty buzzed. 

I crawled into bed and just felt sad. Not because of these toads cancelling on us but because of XFactor. 

I laid there sobbing for what felt like hours and finally passed out...

Why is he still making me sad? Why, why, why, why. 

Ugh, maybe more on that another time...not in the mood to type about it. 

I also cancelled tonights date with Ram (Kayne West date) - just not in the mood to fake it today. I'm exhausted and stupidly sad about Cyrus. 

Sorry to be such a ray of sunshine today - I'm sure all this positivity is exactly what you stopped by for. But hey, this is real talk, real life and real, stupid emotion. 

Hopefully this weekend we can get back on track with slaying all day.

xo

Elle

I must be a magician because perfect seems to be the word of the month. 

Everrrrrry toad keeps saying how perfect I am...Ummm...you guys must be complete idiots because that couldn't be further from the truth..
I am playing you all like it's my job, cute you think I am so sweet though. 

Actually, it'd be nice to have a guy who understood that I have more options than I know what to do with these days..maybe lose this perfect crown so we can be real about things? Perhaps in due time...

Last night I went over to Jake's.... 
The sex the day before was so insane I couldn't resist, just neeeeded it. 

So we hooked up, it was fantastic, he tells me "you're so perfect" & finally I decided we should "talk." Put this perfect shit to bed...

He immediately got nervous and tensed up...
Fuck, where do I even start with this? 

Me: "So we haven't realllllly talked since the day after your birthday party when I cheated on XF...and I want to clear a few things up...
1. I am definitely not perfect, if I was, I wouldn't have cheated on my ex with you
2. I am not looking for marriage and kids RIGHT now but it's gotta be on the table with the next guy I call my boyfriend. If I choose you, you've gotta be all in and really ready to be a boyfriend, not just my fuckbuddy friend."

Jake: "I don't think too much about the future beyond wanting to be successful, I'm an up and comer, on the rise kinda guy...I don't have it all together yet and I know you want and deserve a guy who has their life together. But we are perfect and I think we should just give this a try. There is no one I've wanted since I met you."

Me: "Yeah, I'm not ready for a boyfriend yet....It's been a month and it wouldn't be fair to you for me to lie about where I am in the stages of getting over my ex. I need more time. I just wanted you to know its OK that you don't have it all together yet...I'd just want to know that if we dated we'd both be working towards a long term future together not just something for the right now. 
Would you step it up if you were my boyfriend?"

Jake: "Yeah, I'd probably step it up."

Me: "Probably?????"

Jake: "I mean yeah, I'd definitely step up my game. I hate you dating all these different guys, it makes me so bitter when I know what we have."

Me: "I am not looking just for some rich guy, I am more concerned with the small stuff...being helpful, opening doors, going out of your way to make me happy, etc. That is how  my dad raised me and it's what I expect...The little things end up being the big things in life...its all a summation, you know?"

Jake: "Yeah I get it. We get along so well, we have a decent amount in common, we just have chemistry Elle..."

Me: "Yeah but I need more than just chemistry..."

Ugh, he isn't getting the hint that he needs to step up his small stuff game BIG times...

So no we are not dating, I am not locking myself down until after Miami birthday weekend - that's for damn sure. I don't need to feel guilty for having the best time of my life. 

I am not settling this time...if I do give Jake a chance it means....

Cyrus didn't pursue me...(he hasn't texted since Sunday) and Jake stepped up his small stuff game, big times. 

Who do you want to win? Cyrus or Jake? Vote below. 

Stay tuned...

Elle

PS Podcast launches mid-October! GET EXCITEDDDD!!!!

​& we are back! This time sober and able to adequately type and story tell. 

Saturday: 30 days XFactor Free aka I am gonna do whatever I want today because damn, I am proud of myself. I spent the day with Arash - we are so married its a little insane. I woke up made us breakfast, we did soulcycle together then went shopping for camping supplies, coffee, clothes, home goods, groceries, etc. Totally married. That night I have decided we will go dancing because I am celebrating this milestone and that is what sounds fun right now. Arash bails on me, Adi bails on me and now I am left date-less for my dancing plans... WTF am I supposed to do? I am not going alone. 

My girl A is watching football at our neighborhood bar so I decide I'll go say hey to her real quick and maybeeee I can convince Jake to join me on this dancing adventure. I get over there to find he's not with them...Where is he?? A informs me he is on a date. Ummmm....wtf. I have no right to be jealous because HELLO I am dating the entire city right now but ew, come back and ditch this girl. I see him walk by the bar with her and I am instantly SO jealous. I tell A and I decide to leave, fuck dancing with Jake - I'll find someone else, this is stupid. Why do I even care?

A being the awesome chick she is spies HARDCORE for me. 5 minutes after I leave, he shows up with his date. A snaps a pic of her to me which was hilarious and reassuring that I am definitely the hotter option. I decide to be extra evil and text Jake, "come dancing with me!" He replies while on date, "I didn't wear my dancing shoes." I respond back, "cmon, dont be lame!" -- no replies... So finally right before I am walking out the door I say... "OMG I am so dumb, you're still on your date. I thought it'd be finished by now, my bad - have fun." His reply... "I'm at a Kanye concert." 
Me: "Hilarious - focus on your chick, cya." 

So because the universe supports me moving on from XF, I get a text from an old tinderfella, J. I can't remember when we dated but it was a long ass time ago, he keeps in loose touch each time he notices my snapchat is showing signs of singleness...

Me: "I can't decide if I should go dancing or not...I am dressed and ready..."
J: "I'll be there in 15 minutes, we are doing this." 

Well, that was easy. J is 6'4, works in politics, really nice, not a great kisser & is an amazing chef. We meet up, grab drinks and start chattering... I tell him I am celebrating 30 days of single which might sound ridiculous but letting go of XF has been a hellacious battle and I am really proud of myself this time. He's beyond supportive, tells me how glad he is to see me, how stunning I am and is really grateful for the opportunity to be with me again. 

I ask him when we dated, its blurry because it was so long ago & all I remember is why I didn't want to date him. 

J: "Wait, why didn't you wanna date me? Clearly I understood that but it was a pretty big disappointment nonetheless.."

Life can change so fast...yesterday marked 1 entire month of no XFactor...sure, I caved and contacted him but no facetiming, no meeting up, no crawling back...

It's insane when I think about it...just one short month ago I was devastated. Now? I'm not. I feel sexier, & more empowered than ever before. 

It's a magical feeling to be quite honest. 

When I think about XFactor, it still feels like a funeral...but I definitely am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel now. 

We hold onto what we are familiar with because we fear we won't do better...happens all the time and its bullshit. You can do better. You can get what you want. You just CANT be afraid of fucking going for it. 

(PS I just got home from a date so my typing is likely gonna be a bit of a mess, hang with me homies.)

We have ALOT to discuss, guys. So much has happened...Grab your popcorn and let's get to it.

Thursday: Baseball double date & Kanye West concert...Baseball was actually alot of fun, Jake and I reconnected and by the time I departed for the concert, I felt reallllly bad leaving him. I knew it was a dick move before I agreed to the concert but this is MY single journey and I owe nothing to anyone. SO fuck it, I was gonna do both because thats what I wanted. 

He was legitimately and rightfully pissed I left...We can pick that saga back up later though...

So I get to Kanye and meet my date by the doors of the VIP section...ummmm this is fucking so cool. He looked exactly like his photo, was such a gentleman and very talkative. 

HOOOOORAY! This toad is promising! We have a great time chatting about all kinds of stuff, he is attentive, introduces me to everyone in his suite, touches my back when dancing, just super nice and so comfortable. 

Then he offers me a drink...I ask for water to be safe...I have a gut feeling this guy doesn't drink-drink considering we went through half a concert with no talk of a cocktail...

Good moves on my part because he doesn't.
Womp, womp, womp, womppppppp. 

This might be a stupid dealbreaker but hey, its a lifestyle thing. So we finish out the concert and he offers to drive me home, bonus points. 

We get to my house and he's so nervous...I can tell he wants to kiss me but doesn't know what the fuck to do so he doesn't. He says he'd really like to see me again, I agree to see him again...he tells me I am incredibly beautiful, I linger for a second, still no kiss andddd Im out. 

Guys who kiss on the first date are always ten steps ahead of the guys who don't. It gives you a gauge of the chemistry which is SO crucial. 

He is definitely in my tinder friend zone though...so nice and an awesome guy to be friends with but I don't see a future in that one...that being said, we have a date Thursday night. 

Onto Friday aka CYRUS!!!

Well...
All that anticipation for Z was a waste of fucking time. He is SUCH a loser my head actually wants to spin off my body and roll onto the floor into a pile of sand. 

He asked if I'd watch a soccer game with him...one of his teams was playing and God forbid he miss a match...Sorry, no girl wants to watch soccer on a first date. (XFactors basketball obsession was enough to teach me that dudes who put sports before ladies ARE THE FUCKING WORST.) 

Date? This isn't a date.

HUH? WHAT IS IT THEN? 

This MORON doesn't consider meeting me a date. EXCUSE ME Sir. Dumblefuck but you are 31 years old...WTF DO YOU THINK THIS IS????????? We haven't been texting every single day for two weeks for this to not be a "date".

Oh you know just meeting for soccer and a drink...he doesn't call it a date until it's "exclusive". So basically you're still in middle school?

Alright jackass you are clearly a waste of my precious fucking time, lose my number, cya NEVER. 

How hard is it to plan a time + place to meet for drinks? 

Apparently for some folks, it's impossible. 

Z is the worst. WTF is the plan!? It is 3pm...we are going to meet when? I said I'm free at 8, to which I got no reply...

Ummmmmmm....this is bullshit. No wonder he's such a good texter, he probably never makes it past that stage to actually meeting someone. 

To say I am turned off is a gross understatement. 

IDK how we went from 3 potentials to 1. 

Cyrus is pretty much last man standing at this point. 

Thanks God for making this an easy decision? 

Sigh. 

Sometimes dating really does BLOW. 

xo xo,

​Angry Elle

Oh California, you are always so good to me. 

I am officially back on the East Coast and mannnnn am I sad about it. I landed, had to work all day, got assaulted, planned a BBQ, had a melt down, cried for the first time since dumping XF andddd I'm wondering, why the fuck did I come back??

I always go through the post Cali blues and despite staying EXTRA busy, I am still really sad. 

We haven't discussed the last of my California dating adventures so here is round 3/3. 

We attempt a grouper, none of the guys we are matching with are nearby, no one is committing to show up, shit just isn't panning out and I am kind of exhausted by it at this point so I say fuck it. Let's go out with friends and just hang out. We head to the same destination we went to last Saturday and resolve that it'll be a date free night. 

That is until Bestie texts Moe where we are...he replies, I'll be there in 17 minutes...and 17 minutes later - Rami and Moe appear before us.

Ummmm Holy SHIT Rami is so hot. I was wasted Tuesday but I am not right now and DAMN - this is fantastic! He texted me and I didn't reply...hopefully he isn't pissed? 

Nope, he's not.
He's actually incredibly sweet, insanely good looking and super attentive. He tells me how he hasn't stopping thinking of me since we met, that there is a depth behind my eyes and he can tell I am just a really good girl. Yep, a really good girl who fucked you about 2 hours after meeting you, nail on the head definition of "good girl." I laugh in my head and let him continue to compliment me. 

Finally, we all decide to leave. We get to besties house and hop out of the car...he pushes me up against it and starts kissing me. Definitely an improvement over Tuesday but still not great....he's so hot though, who caressssss. He tells me that kissing me is all he could think about since he left me Tuesday. Aw, so cute! I love guys who are expressive. Bestie refuses to let them come in because she's tired and we know exactly where things are headed if we do. I say my goodbyes to Rami, she says ciao to Moe and the tinder dating is finally over. 

Rami has texted me nonstop since which is so adorable. I don't think we would ever date but it's nice to see that I wasn't just a one night stand type deal, he actually really likes me. I guess I said I'd be back in 2 months so he's expecting me to return....hmmmm....oops? 

So now I am back in reality....here's updates on that.
1. Jake and I got into a fight. He was drunk Saturday when we were facetiming and called me a drama queen after I just finished sobbing about leaving my family. I hung up on him, texted him I don't appreciate him being a dick and turned off my phone. He came to my BBQ yesterday and I swiftly ignored him. Finally at the end I told him I was awaiting an apology that never came which is why the cold shoulder was out. He apologized, asked to sleep over, I said no and that was that. The luster of Jake is fading fast...sadly, I'll be dealing with him again on Thursday.

2. Z. We are apparently going out tomorrow. What time? When? Where? NO FUCKING CLUE. The most annoying thing ever. Do guys think we have no plans besides to sit and await their call? WTF dude. I am busy, I need 24 hour notice on wtf we are doing. GROW UP. G also informed me they have a fantasy football draft for work tomorrow...if Z cancels on me again.....BOY BYE. Two strikes and you are SO fucking out. 

3. Cyrus. I took charge and planned a date for Friday, he accepted and that's great news. I am quite busy during the week so Friday was really my best opportunity to make something happen even though I'd prefer to have seen him yesterday or today. I hope that initial spark hasn't faded....

4. I lost my shit again on XF. I was so tired, I was so sad, I couldn't help it. I did ALL of the cooking for this BBQ last night and normally, that would be his role. I felt the loss of him so strongly and I couldn't shake it. I texted him.. "I wish there was an American genocide of Armenians, I hate you all!!!! I would like you to jump off a bridge. You and your family really fucked me up and I don't deserve it!" SOB, SOB, SOB, SOB. I was a wreck. I haven't cried since the day I ended it and holy lord was this a hurricane. He called me, I screamed, I sobbed, I screamed more. We talked this AM and once again, he fucking SUCKS and I am so bitter he lied to me. Worst part - my face has been puffy as fuck all day. Not cool, not cool. 

5. Arash and I got into a fight. I was discussing his dating life at the BBQ and he was pissed about me airing his laundry. I felt bad, apologized immediately and hopefully all is well? I've decided with near certainty that nothing will happen between us. I can explain that more another day but I just don't feel it, plain and simply. 

Now, I desperately need to add new guys to the roster. Tinder has had the worst looking toads today, idk what is going on but I am not a fan of it. Send good vibes that new, super sexy fellas come my way stat.

Now, it's time for some much needed sleep.

xo xo, 
Elle 

Well, it's been an interesting 24 hours...
I got this gut feeling, similar to the one I had August 10th when I ended it with XF...I felt there was more to the story as to why he wasn't proposing, besides his fucktard parents. 
So I called him. 
No answer...really? 
I know I've been a bitch but you're honestly going to ignore me? 

No, no, no, no ya don't. 
I text him, we need to talk - I am finally ready. 
He says, "what's the agenda Elle? There always is one."
"No agenda, XF."
"So you honestly just want to chat and catch up?"
"Something like that..."

He calls. 
We of course get into it...Me - how the fuck have you not contacted me? WTF is wrong with you? Aren't you upset? Don't you want me back!?

Him - WTF is all this bullshit everyone keeps reporting to me on social media, WTF Elle you're fucking with me and it's shady and it makes me not want to speak to you.

I try to defend myself, I do a terrible job, he keeps telling me that he 100000% would have proposed when he felt ready...DUDE, WHEN THE FUCK WAS THAT EVER GOING TO BE? Enough is enouggggghhhh.

We hang up and start texting. The mood lightens a bit. 

Mind you, I didn't reach out to rekindle. In past situations - that was typically my goal but this time...I know I really can't. I owe it to myself to really focus on myself and not settle. Even though he's going to be incredibly successful, it was still settling.

So this morning on facebook I see a photo of him with a coworker...she is a painter and she painted a portrait of him...a photo I took of him and sent to her...I text him to let him know it's a great photo, nice to see it. He replies, we are OK...

Then I do my daily ritual of reading my horoscope...now that it's September, I get the big kahuna month long one...It's of course insanely accurate and all the sudden I feel compelled to email him. You read that below, if you haven't go do so. 

Let's diagnose his reply...
1. He is accepting that I am moving on, still not trying to get me back...what? 
2. He knows me well....I always have an agenda when it comes to dating. There is always a strategy and for damn good reason...there NEEDS to be. 
3. It's nice to know he won't be dead to me and if I need him, he'll be there...I don't plan on "needing" anyone for awhile but it's a nice sentiment...
4. How the fuck am I going to handle when he finds someone else? If she's not Armenian....MAN, it's gonna suck. PLEASE God let me move on first...Put the guy I am going to marry in my path, PLEASE. I am so sick of molding the perfect guy just so he will end up with the bitch after me. 
5. Now I really am free to move on....HOLY SHIT that's insane. 

So right now, that's what is going through my mind...I am excited to be able to stop torturing him by making an idiot of myself on snapchat, that served its purpose and now I can go back to living without caring who is watching. 

Sigh. Back to DC tomorrow night...Z planned a date for Tuesday, he's still perfect. Jake will see me whenever, nada from Cyrus. 

xo xo,
​Elle

​#1 - *Jimmy Choo shoes that meowed... now that that is taken care of

I've always told you that you were the best thing that has ever happened to me. You're the most amazing person I've every met and like you said, we really did become best friends. There isn't a better match for me out there which is why I always tell you everything from now on will just be settling. 

Of course I knew what your antics were all about with posting all that you did on social media. You're a person of agendas (hence my questioning you yesterday before we spoke) and you smartly always have a reason for doing the things you do. You're incredibly intelligent and that's one of the things I find most attractive about you. What upset me about your posts wasn't the content of your posts... but it was the publicizing our relationship. Out of respect to both of us, some things are better kept between us.  

As I've continually told you, I don't/can't hate you. I love you too much for that. I will ALWAYS support you in what you do in life. I will ALWAYS be there for you if you ever need anything. I will ALWAYS offer my advice to you if you seek it. I don't want to lose you either. 

I love you.

There are so many things that come into my mind after reading this...but now isn't the time to discuss them. Stay tuned for the next post...
Elle